Musings of a Wench

In which I hurt myself again

No, seriously, I gave myself a goosegg, have funny vision for a while and have had a killer headache since about 2 pm yesterday. Now, I know it's my own damn fault. Like, seriously, wear a helmet. But I haven't, mainly because I am a chicken snowboarder. I refuse to do jumps, I don't like going that fast and I have learned how to fall. So I don't wear a helmet because I don't do the dangerous things or runs, and John's always been dead set against them.

It was a pretty great day of snow at Sunshine, but the light was terrible. Most of the day was spent with flat light. If you've ever seen it, you know what I'm talking about. The best way to describe it is that on really overcast days, the light fails to illuminate the snow, so you have no idea of what the terrain is like. Are you going to go uphill? Downhill? Is there a cliff coming up? You just can't see. While on a clear day, or even a less cloudy day, you can see every track in the snow, every groom line, every dip and valley. It makes for a hell of a lot easier riding. Flat light sucks - it just makes it that much harder. So we were going off the Standish chair, on Big Bunker's, I think. (Either a blue or a black run, lots of impossible to see moguls.) I made it to almost the bottom, and then started on the trail out of the run back onto the main trail, trying for some speed because the trail at that point is so flat I know I have to walk it if I can't get enough momentum here. I wasn't going very fast, but that didn't matter. The little trail ended up in a pair of jumps - which I sure as hell did not see, as they looked damn flat in the light. So not only will I refuse to do jumps and never have learned how to do it (in fact, I can go off jumps and make sure I never leave the ground, by using my knees to keep me grounded), I didn't even see them coming. All I know is that I'm falling badly. I ride right foot first, but I somehow landed on the back of my head, hitting the right side of my occipital ridge. You remember those old Batman shows, where when someone gets punched, the screen freezes and the word BAM or POW or whatever is shown on the screen? Well, it was like that, but I didn't actually see the word. (Which was probably CRACK anyway.) But my vision went black, with a border of spiky edges in bright colours, neon orange and the like. The pain was rather breathtaking. For the next twenty minutes, there were colourful lines made out of triangles in my left eye.

Of course, John thought I was being a wimp and was less than sympathetic, that jackass. His parents have taught him this totally fucked up belief that if you are sympathetic and kind, people won't get better, so it's better to be callous. Or something, I don't really understand. All I know is that when I want a hug, he wants me to buck up. (His parents have so much to answer for, you have no idea...) But two hours later, when the headache got so bad I had to stop boarding, he became very kind. Go figure. I guess it means I need to prove that I really am hurt? Anyway, sorry, that's just my bitterness showing through.

The headache was bad. when we got home, we went into the sauna to sooth the sore muscles, and as long as I kept my eyes closed with a towel around my eyes and didn't move, I was okay. John made dinner while I lay on the couch watching Grey's Anatomy and waiting in vain for the Tylenol to kick in. At 10, I took another one, pain still shockingly intense and went to bed. When John came up I made him put a cool cloth on my head and that helped.

The pain is less today, and the swelling is down a lot. At no point did I experience any of the scary concussion signs - nausea, uneven pupils, passing out, or so on. I know I'll be fine. I just need for this killer vise of a headache to go away. Oh, and for the whiplash to heal. I helmet would not have done anything for the tendon on my neck which is all sore today. And it's not that sore - no more than if I had done a bunch of crunches followed by a pilates workout with my head and shoulders off the ground. I am sad, because I had best skip my lunch exercise class, and I really love to hate the Bootcamp class.

My poor body - I have a big burn on one finger, three cuts (only one which I can explain) on the the next finger, a sore neck, a concussion, some type of urineary track infection, sore muscles, and so on. What the hell am I doing to myself?!?! Also, was I always such a kluzt? (Well, probably, but this is a little over the top, even for me, you know?)

Oh, and the helmet thing? Yeah, I think I'll be buying myself one of those. :(

posted by Morgan @ 8:53 a.m.